Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Do you ever?

Do you ever blame Crohn's for far more than it deserves?  My husband and I have a running joke in our house that "the Gremlin did it".  Who ate all of the ice cream?  I bet the Gremlin did it.  If someone splashes water all over the bathroom floor, I can bet that darn Gremlin had something to do with it.

I find the same thing to often be the case with my Crohn's disease.  Feeling queasy?  Crohn's disease.  Fever and chills?  Crohn's disease.  I will admit that many times over the years Crohn's was the culprit.  But there have also been many times that I blamed a flare on whatever symptoms I might be having at the time only to find out that no active Crohn's could be found.  I remember a time or two of actually being disappointed.  Like maybe I was crazy.  Why would I have this combination of symptoms if it wasn't Crohn's acting up?

I think it is a slippery slope having Crohn's in my back pocket to blame.  If I blame every pain, twitch, or gurgle on Crohn's disease, I can also fall back on it as an excuse for any number of things.  Made a bad grade on my exam?  I think my Crohn's was starting to flare and had me distracted.  Can I go on a ski trip?  I better not, my Crohn's might flare or I might need to go to the bathroom while out on the mountain.  Road trip?  I can't, what if I need to go to the bathroom and cannot find a decent gas station?

I used all of the above mentioned excuses and many more over the years.  I happened to be sick enough that no one ever questioned my handy Crohn's excuse.  But I got tired of letting it define me.  I cannot deny that I have Crohn's but it is way down on the list of things I think of when I describe myself now.

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